Archive | June, 2012

Chemo #1 complete

29 Jun

Today we hung our last bag of busulfan. I have two more days of chemo, these two days are expected to be tougher. A new drug, a whole new beast. I will start the chemo at noon and it will drip for 4 hours.
I hope to have some good sleep tonight to help prepare my body for the ride tomorrow.

Jude 1:2
“mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance.”

Day -5

28 Jun

I woke up again in this unfamiliar “new home” I struggle to find it comfortable. I look for the good but the separation from everything I love seems overwhelming. Often when my throat tightens and emotions brim I realize I am focusing on me and the things I am missing, and not His plans. He paved this road for us and beckoned us to follow Him in complete faith. I need to refocus often as I journey through these days.

Today I was given a perfect distraction and great joy as I hugged each of my girls and saw their faces. I so desperately long to be the active mom I have always been, present in their lives and Adam’s teammate. We will continue to take this journey one day at a time, and refocus often.

Desiring restful sleep tonight. Only 3 more days of chemo!

Paige at her swim meet tonight…I was cheering for her in spirit!

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Day -6

27 Jun

Psalm 143:1,5 &8
” o lord, hear my prayers, listen to my cry for mercy; in your faithfulness and righteousness come to my relief….I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done. I spread out my hands to you; my soul thirsts for you like a parched land….let the morning, bring me word of your unfailing love for I have put my trust in you show me the way I should go for I lift up my soul.”

This scripture really hit home for me in this place. I feel as though I seek His mercy, along with His grace and will. I trust in His faithfulness and righteousness. I often ponder what this road would feel like without my faith in Him and my trust that He hears me when I call. I call out to him throughout my day and night for small bits of His peace and gentleness.

As I reflect and glance out the window at His beautiful artwork I am in awe. I love when talking to Paige about God’s handiwork we can smile and truly enjoy the awesomeness of all
He made: rainbows, mountains, trees and lakes. Nature has always been a way I can easily connect with our Creator.

All my “big girl” years one cry of my heart has been to know Him more, to let my actions and my life bring Him glory. It is something I repeatedly asked of him, and as I look back over the years of my journals it is evident i yearned for this, but struggled to grasp its full meaning. My soul yearns to know Him so well that I can discern His way and His voice above all else. In this moment here I feel He is allowing me to receive glimpses of Him I might have missed. I am challenged to be still, and wait and trust. I long to walk in the way I should go. I trust and hope in His leading each day, even on G110-5.

Day -7

26 Jun

This is medically what they title today, day -7. The day of transplant they call day 0. From there we graduate to + days. My 5th bag of chemo is being hung. One difference between my experience here and Akron General is that they keep me hooked up constantly to fluids, which means I never lose Luci (my pole). We will become good friends. I have felt good today. I have had my normal chemo headache, which has happened every start day of chemo. I hope to sleep better tonight and wake up without it tomorrow. I walked a lot today, and enjoyed time with Adam this morning, and mom this afternoon. The day feels entirely too long. Why is it time creeps by when you want it to speed by, and yet as a whole time keeps slipping away all too fast.

I am thankful the girls were distracted by great friends and the zoo. I don’t think they hardly noticed I was gone. Face-time is a wonderful thing for us.

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My new world

25 Jun

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It is June 25th, which marks the beginning of a new journey. I have much to be thankful for. I am blessed with a loving husband, I have three delightful (most of the time) girls, supportive family and friends, I am in remission and I have a perfect bone marrow match. Today I start my chemo regimen which will be 7 days. They say it is tough, and I believe it. I am praying for strength and courage.

These pictures provide you a glimpse into my new world. I am on the 11th floor with a special air system to help provide me with pure and clean air. It is complete with a helicopter pad landing just outside my window. We arrived today around 2. It was hard to say goodbye to the girls. I desperately wanted to be strong, but the tears came as I allowed myself to think about the days missed and the time away from the girls that I cherish. I continue to embrace even more the fact that those girls are His children, and He is teaching me even more about leaving them in His constant care.

Upon arrival Adam and I got settled. I had a chest CT for a baseline starting point. It is mind boggling how this life saving drug has so many other potential harmful effects to the rest of my body. Again, I lay it down at His feet. I am now hooked up to the pole again, and will have a constant drip for many days to come. Keep praying and believing, He has been faithful. He is a loving Creator that wants us to take refuge in Him.

Psalm 5:11
” But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them that those who love your name may rejoice in you.”

Lots a veggies lentil

25 Jun

Lots Veggies Lentil Soup
1 teaspoon Olive Oil
1 med size onion cut and dice
3 garlic cloves minced
2 teaspoons dried thyme
1 teaspoon dried tarragon
½ tsp sea salt
2 ribs celery, diced
½ lbs carrots, diced
½ lb zucchini, diced1 cup French lentils (green are ok too)
6 cups vegetable broth
6 ounces tomato sauce
¼ lb spinach leaves washed and chopped (3cups)
Preheat preheat pot over med heat. Saute onion in oil 5 min. Add garlic, thyme, tarragon, pepper and salt, sauté another min. Add celery, carrots, zucchini, lentils and veg. broth and cover and bring to boil. Once boiling lower and simmer and cook for 45 min. until lentils and veggies are tender. Add tomato sauce and spinach and cook until wilted. Let sit for 10 min. Even better the next day

Cabbage soup

25 Jun

Irish White Bean and Cabbage Stew
(printer-friendly version)
Add a smoky flavor by sprinkling on a little hickory salt or Liquid Smoke just before serving.
Ingredients
1 large onion, chopped
3 ribs celery, chopped
2 to 3 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 head cabbage, chopped
4 carrots, sliced
1 to 1-1/2 pounds potatoes, cut in large dice
1/3 cup pearled barley (optional or substitute with gluten-free grain)
1 bay leaf
1 teaspoon thyme
1/2 teaspoon caraway seeds
1/2 teaspoon rosemary, crushed
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
6-8 cups vegetable broth
3 cups cooked great northern beans (2 cans, drained)
1 14 1/2-ounce can diced tomatoes
1 tablespoon chopped parsley
salt to taste
Instructions
Crock Pot: Place the vegetables, seasonings, and barley into a large (at least 5 quart) slow cooker. Add enough vegetable broth to just cover the vegetables (start with 6 cups and add more as needed). Cover and cook on low heat for 7 hours. Add beans, tomatoes, parsley, and salt to taste. Check seasonings and add more herbs if necessary. Cover and cook for another hour.
Stovetop: Place vegetables, seasonings, barley, and broth into a large stockpot. Cover and simmer until vegetables are tender, about 45 minutes. Add remaining ingredients, check seasonings, and add more herbs if necessary. Simmer uncovered for at least 15 minutes before serving.
Cooking time (duration):75 minutes
Number of servings (yield): 6
Makes 6 large servings. Per serving: 254 Calories (kcal); 1g Total Fat; (3% calories from fat); 12g Protein; 52g Carbohydrate; 0mg Cholesterol; 50mg Sodium; 12g Fiber. Weight Watchers Core/ 4 Points.

Pasta

25 Jun

This is also good on linguine –hmmm barbecue linguine–the best of both worlds ?

1 1/2 cups lentils, rinsed (NOTE: RED LENTILS WORK MUCH BETTER IN THIS -mashable)
2 medium onions, chopped (1 1/2 cups)
6 mushrooms, chopped
veg water or water (I used dry red wine)
2 cups packed fresh spinach, chopped
1 15 ounce can diced tomatoes (better to DRAIN off the liquid)
2 cups brown rice, cooked (I was a bit short on this so added some cooked rice cereal
1 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp dried sage
1 tsp Mrs. Dash’s garlic and herb seasoning blend
1/2 tsp dried marjoram
1/2 cup of barbecue sauce or ketchup (I think the bq sauce makes this dish–I like extra sauce too when serving)
I added Salt and Pepper to taste

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees (after cooking lentils) . Cook lentils in 2 1/2 cups water until tender, then partially mash lentils in some of the cooking water. (I am not sure I used this amount of water)

2. Stir-fry onions and mushrooms in broth, or water or wine. After they soften add spinach and cook covered until the spinach wilts.

3. Add onions and mushrooms, tomatoes, rice, garlic, sage, Mrs. Dash, and marjoram to lentils.

4. Press into a 9 by 5 inch loaf pan and spread with barbecue sauce on top. NOTE: This recipe actually makes enough for the 9 by 5 and another smaller pan.
5. Bake 45-60 minutes. Serve with mashed potatoes, or linguine or in a sandwich or however.

Trail mix

25 Jun

Allie’s Christmas Trail Mix
2 cups Pumpkin Seeds
1 cup almonds
1 cups pecans
1 cup cashews
¾ cup sunflower seeds
6-8 T Maple Syrup
1 cup cranberries and or cherries
Bake @ 300 20 min
Add berries after baking.
~ actual recipe only calls for 1 kind of nut that was boring to me so I put all 3 in!… you decide.

Chickpea piccata

25 Jun

Chickpea Piccata By: Isa Chandra Moskowitz
1 teaspoon olive oil
1 cup thinly sliced scallions
6 cloves garlic, sliced thinly
2 TB Bread crumbs
2 Cups Vegetable Broth
1/3 cup dry white wine
A few pinches of freshly ground pepper and pinch of dried thyme
1 can chickpeas, drained and rinsed
¼ cup capers with a little brine
3 TB freshly squeezed lemon juice
4 cups Arugula
Preheat a large, heavy bottomed pan over medium heat. Saute the shallots and garlic for about 5 minutes, until golden. Add the bread crumbs and toast them by stirring constantly for about 2 minutes. They should turn a few shades darker.
Add the vegetable broth, wine, salt, pepper, and thyme. Turn up the heat, bring the mixture a rolling boil, and let the sauce reduce by half; it should take about 7 minutes. Add the chickpeas and capers and let heat through, about 3 minutes . Add the lemon juice and turn off the heat. Serve piccata with mashed potatoes, place the arugula in a wide bowl. Place the mashed potatoes on top of the arugula and ladle the piccata over the potatoes. The arugula will wilt and it will be lovely. If you are serving the piccata solo, just pour it right over the arugula.